June 26, 2011

Marina and the Diamonds again...

So none of these songs are new, but for some reason I revisit this album over and over again, especially when I'm having an anxiety attack...which happens a lot. Marina and the Diamonds has helped me through many a time of curling up in a ball in the fetal position on my bed rocking back in forth thinking about the multitude of ways I have screwed up my life...including becoming an art major, haha. Yes the trials and tribulations of being a 20 something without any sort of guidance for a future career path, I feel like a lost sad starved puppy...but not as cute. And now more than ever I need music I can freak out to, especially since all my classmates from high school are now around for the dreaded summer after college graduation...and I of course am running into alllll of them...yeah. So then comes the dreaded "oh how are you?" and "what have you been up to?" And I have to start with "No I haven't finished undergrad yet!" followed by "I'm at Buff State now!" all the while holding a smile while gritting through my teeth as they tell me about what Law/Med/Grad school program they are going to in the fall. Then when I tell them I'm in art now (I am dual degree in chem...but art is my primary...) I get that strange cock-eyed stare, of "what happened to you?" This is probably because I was the girl who won every fucking science award, the girl with the highest regents standardized test scores, the one who went to the University of Toronto and swore I would never ever ever ever come back to Buffalo. Great. So essentially my strange transition disturbs some people including me...hence the panic attacks...but I think I have finally grasped the concept that I am neither completely artsy or sciencey but some strange hybrid in between, and unfortunately I crave a career that can give me a little of both. But until then I will continue to crawl into a ball and and yell the lyrics to Marina and Diamonds songs at the top of my lungs. Because I'm not satisfied with an average life.


  1. You have no idea how much this helped me out

  2. For me it's art and business that's throwing me in different directions, but at least that's a little more manageable than art and science. I realize how late this post is, but I was just listening to this album (again) and those songs still stand out to me when I'm struggling on what path to choose for my life.